name that cat

Just because I may need to purchase a copy of Cat Ownership for Dummies does not mean I'm completely clueless... just mostly.  But this much I know:  a cat who is not fat cannot continue with a name like Fat Boy.  How does he cope?  Isn't his self-esteem shattered by such a label?  I know mine would be.  So to win some brownie points with my new pet, in the profound hope that he won't immediately recognize my ineptitude as hiw new owner, I have decided to bestow upon him a new name, something noble and masculine, one with which he can hold his feline head up high.  And to hopefully score some brownie points with my dog-loving family, this new name is definitely going to be Scottish. :-)

But all I know about renaming pets comes from dogs, and in the dog world you try to make the new name sound similar to the old so that the dog still comes when you call him.  I am told that cats, however, do not have this issue because they don't come when you call them anyway.  Still, the floor is open for your suggestions...